We all have misconceptions. It’s part of life. I’m here to challenge your marriage to now fall in the trap. Here are 5 misconceptions that I had.
1. Meet Each Other’s Needs (High Expectations)
One of the biggest misconceptions is that in marriage is that our partners will fulfill ALL of our needs. We set high expectations and the minute we don’t meet those expectations, we get disappointed. It’s good to set expectations with your spouse, but don’t hold it against them the minute they don’t come through. Talk about your expectations, but more than anything, talk about how can you both work together.
Second, another misconception is that sex in marriage will be boring and will decrease and that is why some people hesitate to get married. Just like everything else, everything requires work. You have to make it happen. We all have busy schedules and we can quickly fall into a routine, including sex. Try to always be intentional with your intimate time. Challenge yourself to have more intimacy with your spouse throughout the week.
3. Agreeing On Most Things
We all have different upbringings and different ways of approaching certain things. Because of this, we will have disagreements. We won’t see eye to eye sometimes. And it could be on the most simplest things and that could bring frustration. It’s ok, if you don’t agree with your spouse. That’s what marriage is all about. How can we work as a team. What we sometimes miss, is that working together is a way of connecting better with our spouse and it brings us closer, and the next time you have a disagreement, you’ll notice that you’ll be more connected with each other.
4. Your Spouse SHOULD Make You Feel Better
Your spouse is NOT responsible to make you feel better. Your spouse is not the source and shouldn’t be the source of your happiness. As a couple of faith, we believe God should be the foundation of your hearts and marriage and your source of happiness should come from Him. If you put all your hope in your spouse, you will be let down. We’re all going to make some kind of mistake. It’s part of the sinful nature of this world.
5. Marriage is Suppose To Be Perfect
If you’re view on a perfect marriage doesn’t include accepting the challenges and difficulties, you’ll have a very hard time being content. Instead of trying to focus on what you don’t have, focus on what you do already have and make it better. In this world of social media, we can easily see other couples and want what they have. Stay in your lane. Your story is not their story. Focus on your marriage and let God continue to write your story.
I’ve been married for 6 years to my lovely wife, and these are some of the things we’ve struggled with. Marriage is beautiful. It’s a journey and a process and we get to see first hand God work in our spouses. Trust him with everything. Make him your foundation and everything else will fall into place.
1 Corinthians 16:14 “Do everything in love”